230+ Halloween Puns That’ll Haunt Your Funny Bone

Halloween Puns

Witching you a fang-tastic Halloween full of pun-derful surprises! Get ready for a boo-tiful time with our Halloween puns like “ghoul-friends” and “scarotene.”

Spooky Wordplay to Tickle Your Funny Bone

  • Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had no body to go with him!
  • What is a ghost’s favorite car? A boo-gatti!
  • Why do witches fly on brooms? Vacuum cleaners are too heavy!
  • What is a mummy’s favorite music? Wrap music!
  • Why do vampires subscribe to magazines? They love talk about circulation!
  • What do you call a haunted chicken? A poultry-geist!
  • Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin!
  • What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I scream!
  • Why didn’t the zombie go to the Halloween party? He had no guts!
  • What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A necktarine!
  • How does a skeleton call his friends? On the tele-bone!
  • Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind!
  • What is a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
  • Why did the ghost go to the bar? For the boos!
  • Why are vampires terrible at relationships? They can’t handle the stakes!
  • What do you call a pumpkin with a degree? A squasholar!
  • Why do ghosts love elevators? It lifts their spirits!
  • Why are werewolves good at time management? They use a lunar calendar!
  • What did one ghost say to another? “Do you believe in humans?”
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
  • What do witches put on their hair? Scare-spray!
  • How do monsters know what’s going to happen? They read the hororgroupes!
  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field!
  • What’s a vampire’s least favorite song? Another One Bites the Dust!
  • What do you call ghost’s true love? His ghoul-friend!
  • Why can’t ghosts tell a lie? You can see right through them!
  • What software do vampires use? Fangdroid!
  • What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone!
  • Why did Dracula become a vegetarian? His doctor said steak was bad for his heart!
  • How do you fix a broken jack-o’-lantern? With a pumpkin patch!
  • What do you call a witch at the beach? A sand-witch!
  • Why don’t mummies have time to relax? They’re always busy wrapping up things!
  • What do you call a vampire that’s won the lottery? Count Cashula!
  • What’s a ghost’s favorite room? The living room!
  • Why did the vampire flunk art class? Because he could only draw blood!
  • What do you get if you cross a dancer and a vampire? A fang-tango!
  • How do skeletons communicate? By using the x-ray phone!

Ghostly Giggles: Puns That Haunt

  • Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators? It raises their spirits.
  • Why don’t ghosts like rainstorms? It dampens their spirits!
  • What’s a ghost’s favorite desert? I-scream!
  • What do you call a fat pumpkin? A plumpkin.
  • What do ghosts wear when it rains? Boo-ts!
  • Why did the ghost bring a ladder to the party? He wanted to lift the spirits!
  • What do you get when you divide a pumpkin’s circumference by its diameter? Pumpkin pi.
  • What type of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music.
  • What does a vampire never order at a restaurant? A steak sandwich!
  • What do ghosts say when something is really neat? That’s boo-tiful!
  • What kind of roads do ghost pirates with bad breath hate sailing on? Halitosis bays!
  • What do you call a ghost’s true love song? A boo-gie tune!
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  • What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl to the dance? He didn’t have the guts!
  • What do you call it when a ghost gets a new cell phone? Phantom data plan!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
  • Why are pumpkins so smart? Because they have a lot of gourd sense!
  • What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire? It’s a pain in the neck.
  • What do baby ghosts wear for protection? Pillowcases!
  • How do you make a skeleton laugh? Tickle its funny bone!
  • Why was the tiny ghost asked to join the football team? The coach needed a little spirit.
  • How do you repair a broken jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch.
  • What’s a tired Dracula’s favorite holiday? FANGsgiving!
  • Why did Dracula go to jail? He was caught robbing a blood bank!
  • What do you call ghosts that haunt Skyscrapers? High spirits!
  • What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A necktarine!
  • Why did the vampire read the newspaper? He heard it had great circulation!
  • Why are graveyards noisy? Because of all the coffin!
  • What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween? Ghoul-aid!

Boo-tifully Crafted Halloween Jokes

  • What do you call a haunted chicken? A poultry-geist!
  • Where do ghosts buy their Halloween candy? At the ghost-ery store!
  • What do you say when you meet a witch at the beach? “You’re sand-witch-tastic!”
  • Why did the skeleton start a band? He had all the trom-bones.
  • What do you call a vampire who makes people laugh? A comedidracula!
  • Why did the ghost go to the party? Because he heard it was going to be boo-ming!
  • What’s a mummy’s favorite type of music? Wrap music!
  • Why did Dracula become a vegetarian? He couldn’t resist necktarines.
  • What’s it like being kissed by a vampire? It’s a pain in the neck!
  • Why don’t mummies have friends? Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves!
  • What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? Boo-berry pie!
  • How does a skeleton cool off? He sits in front of a fan-tom!
  • Why don’t ghosts like rain? It dampens their spirits!
  • How did the zombie become a gardener? Because he had a green thumb!
  • What was the witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
  • Why did the mummy get a promotion? Because he always wrapped up his work!
  • Where do baby ghosts go during the day? Dayscare centers!
  • Why did Frankenstein never text his friends? He didn’t have a nerve to send the message!
  • Why don’t witches wear baseball caps? Because there’s no point!
  • What do you get if you cross a werewolf with a sheep? A woolf!
  • How do you make a skeleton laugh? Tickle his funny bone!
  • Why was the jack-o-lantern scared? Because he had no guts!
  • What did the ghost say to his wife? “You look fang-tastic!”
  • Why are mummies great spies? They always keep things under wraps!
  • What is a ghost’s favorite color? Boo!
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
  • Where do witches get their shoes? At the boot-ique!
  • What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? He is mist!
  • Why did the bat miss school? Because he needed some recuperation!
  • What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A necktarine!
  • How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch!
  • What did one ghost say to the other at the party? “You are un-boo-lievably scary!”
  • Why don’t zombies like fast food? They can’t catch it!
  • What room does a ghost not need? A living room!
  • What is a ghost’s favorite ride? The roller-ghoster!
  • Why did the vampire read the newspaper? He heard it had great circulation!
  • Where do ghosts mail their letters? At the ghost office!
  • What do ghosts use to wash their hair? Sham-boo!
  • Why was the ghost such a bad liar? Because you could see right through him!
  • What is a skeleton’s least favorite room? The living room!
  • Why did the monster sit under the light? He wanted a light snack!
  • Where does a werewolf like to stroll? The howl-way!
  • What do witches put on their cereal? Scare-y milk!
  • What does a zombie vegetarian eat? Grrrr-ains!
  • What kind of key opens a haunted house? A spoo-key!

One Liner Halloween Puns to Share

  • I told the skeleton he needed to chill, now he’s all about that “bone-vibes” life!
  • Why was the witch’s broom late? It swept in a bit too late with Halloween traffic!
  • I met a vampire at the Halloween party and he was a real “drac-cool-a” dude!
  • The ghost kept playing tricks because he felt “invisible” to everyone there.
  • The mummy thought he was the wrapping king; turns out he was just “wrapped” up in himself!
  • The pumpkin got a job because he wanted to make “squash” of cash!
  • I can’t stop laughing at the skeleton’s jokes; they were just too “humor-ous.
  • Why did the vampire read millions of books? He wanted to “sink” his teeth into new knowledge.
  • The zombie was feeling blue, so he decided to eat some “brain food” to cheer up!
  • Why didn’t the skeleton go to the scary party? He didn’t have the guts!
  • A witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling, of course!
  • Why did the spider join the football team? He heard it was a place to “web” leaves!
  • The vampire got kicked out of the Halloween party; his jokes “bit” too hard.
  • The ghoul was the talk of the party with his “phantom”-tastic dance moves!
  • The Frankenstein monster was a real hit; he was quite the “shock” to meet!
  • What’s a ghost’s least favorite room? The “living” room!
  • Why do mummies make excellent spies? They’re always “wrapped” in secrets!
  • The skeleton went skinny dipping in a “creek” for some “spine-chilling” fun!
  • The jack-o-lantern was relieved when Halloween was over; he was burning out!
  • The vampire left the haunted house — he found it too “coffin-ded” inside.
  • What do you call a monster with no neck? Anything, he can’t “head” you!
  • The ghost decided to start a band; he thought the “boo-sical” scene needed him!
  • The werewolf became a stand-up comedian; his jokes are always a howling success!
  • The witch joined the choir because she had quite the “spell-binding” voice!
  • Why don’t ghosts use social media? They prefer “invisible” networks!
  • The mummy advised his friends to “unwrinkle” the night with fun and friendship!

Ghoulishly Good Groaners for a Chuckle

  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
  • What did the ghost say to the bee? Boo-bee!
  • Why did the vampire read the newspaper? He heard it had great circulation!
  • What do you call two witches sharing an apartment? Broom-mates!
  • How do you fix a broken jack-o’-lantern? With a pumpkin patch!
  • What kind of music do mummies love? Wrap music!
  • Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin!
  • What do you call a monster that has a stormy path? A Cyclone!
  • Did you hear about the ghost comedian? He really gave us a fright and a light!
  • Why are skeletons bad at lying? You can see right through them!
  • What did Dracula say at the blood bank? This is in vein!
  • Why did the skeleton stay calm? Nothing got under his skin!
  • What’s a zombie’s favorite cereal? Rice Creepies!
  • Why was the ghost rude? He didn’t think he could be seen anywhere!
  • What do monsters say at the end of prayer? Ghoul-lujah!
  • What happened to the werewolf who lost all of its fur? It became a barewolf!
  • Why did the ghosts go into the bar? For the boos!
  • What’s a vampire’s favorite fast-food dinner? A stake-out!
  • Why was the mummy so tense? He couldn’t wrap his head around it!
  • What’s a ghost’s favorite street? A dead end!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
  • How does a monster like its eggs? Terror-fried!
  • Why did the zombie go to school? He wanted to improve his deaducation!
  • What’s a skeleton’s favorite musical instrument? A trombone!
  • Why don’t witches wear flat hats? There’s no point to it!
  • What kind of mistakes do ghosts make? Boo-boos!
  • How do ghosts search the web? They use ghoul-gle!
  • Why did the ghost flunk out of school? He couldn’t focus, he was the sheet of the class!
  • Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll unwind!
  • What candy is never on time? Choco-late!
  • How do you make a skeleton laugh? Tickle its funny bone!
  • What do you call a clever monster? Frankenspun!

Witchy Wordplay for a Magical Night

  • Why do witches fly on brooms? It’s the best way to sweep off your feet!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite subject? Spelling, of course!
  • Why was the witch always calm? She knew how to handle witch-ever situations!
  • What do witches put on their bagels? Scream cheese!
  • Why did the witch go to school? She wanted to learn new witch-crafts!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite mode of transportation? A brrrr-oom!
  • Why did the witch join the baseball team? Because she had a wicked curveball!
  • What do you call a witch’s garage? A broom closet!
  • How do witches send messages? Via broom-mail!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite makeup? Ma-scare-a!
  • Why was the witch always smiling at the end of school? Because she crushed her haunting exams!
  • What do witches use on their hair? Scare-spray!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite seasonal treat? Goulash!
  • Why don’t angry witches ride brooms? They fly off the handle!
  • How do witches keep in shape? They watch their cauldrons!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite musical instrument? The broom-chime!
  • Why are witches great for discussions? They always have a witchy remark!
  • What’s a cool witch’s favorite footwear? Sand-witches!
  • Why was the witch a great snowboarder? She had great broom control!
  • Why don’t people like witches? They find them brooming!
  • Where do witches perform? In a flying circus!
  • What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch!
  • How do witches like their eggs? Terrified!
  • What’s a witch’s favorite movie? Hocus Focus!
  • Why was the witch’s wand disciplined? It had spell issues!
  • What do witches get from a living room job? What a striking idea!
  • Why did the witch become a doctor? She had great patients!
  • How did the witch become famous? With a lot of broom and board!
  • What do witches use for cooking? A scare-skillet!

Frighteningly Funny Monster Puns

  • Why did the monster cross the road? To get to the scary side!
  • What do you call a monster with a great sense of humor? A punster!
  • Why don’t monsters eat breakfast? Because they dread the first bite!
  • What’s a monster’s favorite place to swim? Lake Eerie!
  • Why do monsters love going on vacation? They love the chilling views!
  • How do monsters stay cool at a party? They stand by the fan-gore!
  • What’s a monster’s favorite game? Hide and shriek!
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
  • What do you call a monster with no heart? A heartless horror!
  • How do you stop a monster from charging? Take away its credit card!
  • Why was the monster a great musician? He had monster chops!
  • What does a monster use to clean its teeth? A fangbrush!
  • What kind of key does a monster use? A spoo-key!
  • Why did the monster bring a ladder to the bar? To reach the boo-ze!
  • What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A necktarine!
  • What’s a ghost’s favorite meal? Boo-berry pie!
  • How do you make a monster laugh? Tickle its funny bone!
  • How did Frankenstein’s monster become so popular? He was alive with electricity!
  • What is a sea monster’s favorite food? Fish and ships!
  • Why did the mummy go on vacation? To unwind!
  • What do you get if you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frostbite!
  • Why are monsters so good at math? They really count on each other!
  • What did the werewolf say at dinner? “This is fang-tastic!”
  • What’s a monster’s favorite dessert? I-scream!
  • How do monsters communicate during lockdowns? Via howwwwl calls!
  • What’s a monster’s favorite romantic movie? “Beauty and the Beast!”
  • Why did the monster sit in the corner? Because it’s a ghoul-dby!
  • What kind of cheese do monster mice like best? Gorgonzilla!
  • Why was the monster such a terrible comedian? Her punchlines were monsterously bad!
  • Why don’t monsters ever make good pets? They’re always up to some mis-beast-avior!
  • What’s a zombie’s favorite bean? A human bean!

Get ready to brew up some laughter and cobweb your day with eerily awesome fun! With puns like these, you’re sure to have a spook-tacular Halloween, so keep it fun and fang-tastic!

Samar

Punsuniverse — a realm crafted by me, Samar! You will find everything here that is related to puns, weather its food, animals, names or something elsse.

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